INTERNEEEEEEEEET !

At some point we had no phone or Internet. What are they trying to do...KILL ME !

What I'm looking forward to :
-No longer random, hardening of my uterus.
-No longer looking at and inspecting my panties while going to the bathroom.
-No longer pooping like a deer and sometimes even a rabbit.
-No longer flopping around in bed, grunting like a world wide wrestler.
-No longer walking around with my legs spread, my feet turned out and my back arched with a squinted and painful look on my face, because...well, I AM in pain.
-No longer getting looks and comments from people when seen in public...because OMG you are HUGE !
-No longer nagging and bitching at EVERYONE, well maybe I will just a little bit.
-No longer wondering what these little people look like that have been causing all of these problems listed above and holding their tiny little boy bodies in my arms.
-Adult beverages, prescription drugs, illegal drugs, anything that numbs my mind and smothers out the screaming. :)

What I'm NOT looking forward to :
-Sitting on a glove filled with ice.
-Having a nurse squirt water at my verjaynus and putting on those GOD awful hospital panties with a pad the size of a twin size mattress in them on me.
-Looking like there is a triplet that is due ANY TIME for probably weeks after delivery.
-Getting up every 2 hours (if I'm lucky)
-Breastfeeding (or attempting to)
-Breastfeeding all night.
-Breastfeeding during the day when 3 other children will either be trying to help out or trying to kill each other.
-Pumping.
-When Nanny Nicole leaves us on the 27th of August.

There is a poll listed on the right hand side. I am not looking for opinions of the names listed. I've had enough of that....I just want you to pick your favorite of the 4.
Hurry, there isn't a lot of time !

And That Damn Internet

(Words being typed via J at work)

No babies, no Internet.

Damndongdiggitydamn..

36 Weeks

And there I am !
It's not pretty, it's not comfortable and lord knows there are more times than not that I want it to be over....but damn it I'm here and I couldn't be happier.

2nd to last, 2nd to none !

I had my 2nd to last doctors appointment/stress test today. CAN YOU BELIEVE IT !
There are days that I think, I could TOTALLY make it to 39 weeks.
And then there are (more) days when I hope I make it to the next day. (the last few days)

Measuring 44 weeks.
dilated to a 3. (who still thinks I'll make it to August 4th ?)
lost 2 lbs. DAMN IT !
I am questioning how big these boys will be. I've worried about baby A since the ultrasound....I've only gained 47 lbs. I gained 55 with Spence and Cam. I'm going to work REALLY hard on gaining 8 lbs in the next 1 1/2 weeks. Besides the fact that I have a stomach that can hold about 8 oz, and then I reflux even that up, tells me that this is going to be a harder task than I thought.


Sydney showing what a great big sister she will soon be.
She made a bed for Cam and baby Riley (that's her dolls name) and read them both several stories.
This was AFTER she diapered and put jammies on Spencer. (no joke, she really did all of it and quite well I might add) He thought it was a game and a fun one at that so she had to use his full name, "Spencer James...come here" we think it's all pretty funny.
I'm hoping that I will be able to leave all 5 with her once a month while her moms go out for dinner and a movie :) ha ha
She is 2nd to none !

Catch of a lifetime !

Caution while reading this post, the 10th commandment will be broken. You may feel bad about yourself or others upon reading this post.
You may try to find me and steal this rare gem of a woman that is not yours. (don't)
Know now, that she's mine and not yours and will never be yours so there. ppphts

"J"
Her day. (this is no exaggeration...this is a typical day for her)
She gets up between 6:30-7am. Gets to work at 7:30'ish. Works and works and works so hard all day. Comes home and is home by 5:30 pm.
Hugs the kids. Makes dinner.(or picks it up) Plays with kids. Feeds kids dinner. Cleans kids up, cleans dinner up. Plays with kids. TRIES to find time to fix sprinkler heads and change batteries, and do laundry, and stay on top of the weeds. ALL THE WHILE, pushing someone on the swing, jumping with another one on the trampoline and wiping the tears of the last one.
She brings the kids in the house, throws 3 (2 always resist) in to the tub. Washes, cleans, dries, lotions, jammies them and puts them to bed.
If you thought this sounded like a lot, she's still not done. Now she cleans the house up...usually does another load of laundry. She gets my water and pills and finally collapses in to bed. She jumps to the aid of a child who's binky is lost or who's nightmare is too much to take. and has to listen to me moan and move and pee all night long.
She does this only to start all over again the next day.

I complain and nag her because I'm not able to get anything done, so her honey do list grows and grows and there are not enough hours in the day to do it and yet she still manages to do everything that I listed off with (mostly) a smile on her face.
She rarely complains and hardly ever fights back with me.
She has the "yes dear" down to a tee. Even if she's just SAYING it to shut me up. IT TOTALLY WORKS and GOD bless her for it.

She is a dream, a dream I tell you. and not because she kisses my hormonal ass. that is just a bonus. a dream because she can do it all. She's handy, she builds stuff, fixes stuff, she is so self sufficient.

I have every ounce of faith in her and have never had a doubt about her loyalty to me or the kids. I trust her completely.

She changes poopy diapers, wipes snotty noses and plays tiger on the floor with 3 growing kids bucking bronco on her back.

Her love runs deep and I am lucky that I have been the one to swim in it.
She is a great example to her children and to ANY man or woman in a relationship.
If only you were this lucky !

She is my best friend and I'd like to take the time and wish her the HAPPIEST BIRTHDAY ever.
I love you honey !

35 weeks

***********************mamma mia update*************************
Because I have no pride left.
Oh and because I think everyone should be able to point and laugh.

Do you see why I'm not smiling. DAMN that's a big ol belly.


















Jan thinks my belly looks like a big boob ! Now looking at it I do too :) ha ha















This picture is to show you how even the LARGE MARGE maternity shirts look like baby doll shirts on me. WTF ! Thank god for bella bands.


















Look what's in Syd's room.















Look at what's 1/2 way packed. All I need to do is add my cloths.


















We are getting very close. I'm starting to feel how close it is and as exciting as it was to see all of their little cloths freshly cleaned and folded....I'm also keenly aware of the reality of twins and I'm SCARED shitless.

I'm taking my wife to dinner and to see Mamma Mia tonight. (I hope it's good...we loved the Broadway production of it. both times)

****update*****
Loved it. Great movie. Ok that being said, Meryl Streep just won her next Oscar and sang like a mo fo. It wasn't all Meryl Streepy sounding, she REALLY has a GREAT voice.
Pierce Brosnon was one of the leading men and didn't sell me. I just didn't feel him. Other than that the cast was great.

I don't know that the younger generation will love it..I think you have to be a bit of an ABBA fan to really appreciate and enjoy it. I mean it is their songs through out.
I could be TOTALLY wrong though.

Stats !!

First. The boys.

They were NIGHTMARES at their appointment. They screamed and cried like little girls, only Syd who is a little girl has been a ROCK STAR at all of her doctors appointments. Maybe that Sydney told them that they were getting shots all morning long sunk in more than I thought :) ha ha

Spencer, weight 28 lbs 2 oz. 40th %, height 35 1/2 inches 90th %
Physically hitting milestones of a 3 year old.
Verbally on target (I thought they needed some speech therapy but was told I'm crazy :) I got a lot of eye rolling while talking about it. note to self : stop comparing milestones with that of the older sister.
Spencer has 2 new molars on the bottom.
Hep A shot.

Cameron, weight 29 lbs 11 oz 60th %, height 36 1/4 inches 97th %
Physically hitting milestones of a 3 year old.
Verbally on target, again..."he's FINE!" when asked if he needed some speech therapy.
Hep A shot.

My appointment.
I'm dilated to a 2+.
201 lbs. OH YES I AM. Huge lunch. LOTS to drink right before my appointment. It TOTALLY paid off. (now suddenly feeling anxious about my weight and the length of time it takes to remove it......hold please, I am going to drowned out all of these feelings with another ensure:)
We scheduled my induction for the 4th of August. I have a feeling I won't go before this date. I guess you never know though. I really hope they cook to 37 weeks.
I'm feeling pretty damn big. These boys move and it feels as though I'm being hit in the gut by a linebacker.
Oh and did I mention how fucking miserable I am to be around. Yip, well I am. J is my saving grace though and takes it all in stride. You know, she bows her head and walks tip toe.
(pray for J, pray for my children. amen :)

There will be a post soon about how friggin' awesome my wife is. but like the thank you cards that have been sitting next to me for a WEEK now, it will wait. AT LEAST until after Will and Grace is over. I LOVE this show.

They are 2 !!

It's happened. They barely made it and I mean BARELY made it by the hair on their little heads. (the last 2 weeks have been a NIGHTMARE at our house. In fact it seems to have run the entire gamut. is there such thing as pre traumatic stress disorder? seriously?)

They are 2. TWO ! I can't believe these little people who just came out looking more like turtles than babies are now practically men. (yes, acting dramatic comes with pre traumatic stress disorder)

Did I tell you what great friends we have ? A few months back my friend Kelly asked what we were planning on doing for the boys birthday. Her girls birthdays fall in July and August. At that point we could only assume that IF I made it to the 12th of July that I would be on bed rest or worse yet in the hospital. (never assume nothin' sweetheart) Kelly offered to have a combined party at her house. We more or less showed up with cupcakes and plates. The rest was taken care of by our sweet friends and their posse.
It was great. Not only did they plan and execute everything, but all the while they asked me if I needed a drink, or more pizza or babysitters when the boys come. (yes you did...I SPECIFICALLY REMEMBER you offering to take all of my children so that me and J could get away for a wild weekend:)
It turned out great. So many fun people and great friends.

Part of their posse took pictures and I'm now standing in line for prints. so when they send them to me I'll be sure to post.
These are a few that we were able to get. The first 2 hours, one if not all 3 of my children were screaming bloody murder about something. We figured that with 20 children there should be SOME noise. My kids took care of ALL of it. After lunch and cupcakes though they were raring to go and had a BALL !

Screaming episode take 21, took place when Syd was stung by her first bee. Tragic as it was, you'd have thought the bee had ripped off her entire finger. All we got was a blurry picture and a great story to tell her friends and grandparents. She's quite proud now.






















If you don't give a kid a fork.....


















Puff daddy....or in this case puff mommy. This is one of the more attractive pictures of myself. and when I say, damn I look hot, it should be prefaced with..it was 90 + degrees.
This is another reason I smile and nod when people tell me, "oh..you look great"
It's better than screaming LIAR and waddling off.















J put her foot next to mine while taking this picture. She wanted to document what normal is. I think we've all known for a while that I am not normal.
Look at where my ankles used to be. (p.s. I tried soaking them in ice cold water....didn't do a thing)

Bed Rest !!

What I've found with bed rest is that I'm getting real life confused with TV life.
J says to me the other day, "isn't that sad about that family who crashed on their way home from Powell?"
That is when I had to search my head......is that the family who's dad was ejected and the kids had bumps and bruises....or the one with the kid who had internal injuries because of the seat belt.....or the one with the little girl who had suspected head trauma, but was later ok after a CT scan ruled out any bleeding ?
I LOVE Trauma Life in the ER, Code Blue...all of those shows. I have the utmost confidence that if needed I could TOTALLY insert a chest tube in extreme circumstances. You know, if we came upon a wreck or something. Hopefully if this happens, it won't be some poor soul having a simple asthma attack brought on by stress....otherwise that might get kind of messy when I tube the guy :) ha ha


I also love Family Feud and am DISGUSTED when that gross Richard Dawson was on. All drunk and kissy. What a sicko. I feel bad for all of the women who kissed that pig. TOTALLY not worth $5,000.






I also love Flip that House, So you think you can dance (I hope Will wins) and fast forwarding through America's got Talent aint so bad either. In 3 weeks there will be no more TV for me. THANK GAWD !

You would think that with over 600 channels SOMETHING good would be on. Not so much.
You would also think that with nothing on TV I would have plenty of time to blog something with substance and thought. yip, wrong again.

I left the Doctors office Laughing.

******updated******
Weekly appointment, including Dr. Hottie, Ultrasound, Stress test.

No protein in my urine.
Good blood pressure.
Measuring 43 weeks, still.
Not 200lbs yet. damn it. will TOTALLY be 200lbs next week :)
Another fetal fibronectin test. Negative. Gives me another 2 weeks with babies safely inside.
Cervix dilated to a 2.
50 % effaced.

On to the ultrasound. If one more nurse or doctor asks me, casually, have you BEEN tested for gestational diabetes, I'm gonna come unglued.
Baby A, head down. Looks good. Has lots of old man hair in the back. approx. weight 5 lbs 1 oz.
60%

***update*** The belly they are referring to as being extremely large is the babies...not mine. Baby B's belly is measuring 37 weeks via ultrasound. I would kick a doctor in the teeth for making such a fuss over my HUGE belly :)

Baby B head down. Looks good. no hair. "OMG LOOK AT THAT BELLA. Wow, he really has a big belly". me ("what does that mean ? is he ok ? is there something wrong ?")
"no no no, he's fine. have you been tested for GD ?" ("yes. do I need to be tested again?") "no I'm sure you are fine."
approx weight for baby B 6 lbs 9 oz. ARE YOU FRIGGIN KIDDING ME.
98%

Now I didn't get all worked up because Spence and Cam were supposedly 8lb'ers and weren't so I know there is room for error. The perionatologist came in and I asked him, ("is he ok, is there something wrong, is it water, a growth, GAS ?")
"no. he's fine. let's look again, sometimes the measurements can be off. OMG LOOK AT THAT BELLY. He's a heavy weight. just looking at him I can see he's going to be big."
Thank you doctor.
("is there a problem with B being bigger at delivery?") "no, as long as they are both head down there shouldn't be a problem. plus this is your 4th and 5th kid." ("so what you are saying is they are just going to walk out of there ?")

I got on the elevator and turned around, allowing the news to really soak in. I pushed the LL1 button and as the doors were closing I glanced up and saw a great view of the parking lot out of the big glass windows.....and there she was.....BAVERLY....just as cute as she could be waiting for me. I laughed out loud. Which was ok because I was by myself :) This is so my life. and it's good I'm laughin'.

33 weeks. nearly 33 pictures.

33 weeks.


















I decided to bare naked it, because....you'll have a chance to see it all soon any ways :) Me trying to hide the stetch marks. Obviously not trying to hide the tired, the puffy and hot part. DAMN, could I look any more miserable.


















AND THEN, what the hell ! Stretch away. This is my attempt at not looking so miserable. What do you think ? Convincing :)


















Carnival fun
My Syd.
















I envision High School in 14 years. Syd driving her brothers to school :)
















The boys LOVED. L-O-V-E-D the roller coaster. Spencer especially.

















Syd jumping for joy when I agreed to let her go on a bigger kid ride. She had been begging us to go on it since they started putting it together a week or so ago.
















Syd ON the bigger kid ride. I was a bit of a mess and wondered if I should have let her ride on it. (We've all seen the carnie guys who put this shit together.)

















The CUTEST picture EVER !
"Here bro, would you like a taste of my lemonade ?!"

Neglect. Punishment.

There is something eating me up. Those of you that live here may have read in the news about the mother who left her 5 month old baby in the car for 2 hours and as a result the baby died. They are now pressing charges against this mother.
OK ! She claims she forgot that the baby was in the car. Whether that is true or not (as I can't imagine "forgetting" my baby, but you hear about it all of the time) is not for me to say. I don't think that her plan was to kill her baby.

So my question is. Why is this story and situation ANY different than the family at Sugarhouse park who while singing happy birthday to a family member let their 18 month old slip away and drowned in the duck pond?

Or the kids (and there are SOOOO many) who are run over by cars backing up.

Or the babies who fall down a flight of stairs.

My point is....if the parent(s) were RIGHT there, and didn't momentarily "forget" about their children, they would be ok too.

Now I'm NOT saying that the other parents should be prosecuted for what happened to their child. I'm simply saying, why prosecute THIS MOTHER? Why press charges and make her seem SO neglectful? Is losing your child payment enough? As a mother, losing my child would be MORE than payment.

And no....parents who beat, starve, and mentally abuse their children should be punished. Losing their children is not punishment enough.

These 2 stories I mentioned, the car, and the park deaths...happened days apart and I was confused as to why one mother was being beat up and the other given sympathy.

I hate reading the news.

Quickie !

I had my weekly non stress/doctors appointment today.
Dr. Hottie was off by a week....my independence day will no longer fall on "Independence day" DAMN IT ! I wondered if she was just letting me up a week early because I was doing so good. Ya, not so much. I have to stay down until 34 weeks. and can start jumping on the trampoline at 36 weeks.
I'm now dilated to a 2 and 40% effaced. well 1+ but she said that if she were to have been more aggressive...she could have called it a 2. She's oh so careful and has the smallest hands. Thank God for Dr. Hottie being so petite. Me on the other hand...not so petite. I'm measuring 43 weeks and aaalmost to 200 lbs. I'm certain to just cross over before the boys get here.
Everyone looks good and both boys are head down. We scheduled tentatively an induction for the first week in August. Nobody but me seems to think that I'll get there. WELL JUST TRY AND CHALLENGE ME !!