And it's not even Halloween....and I promise that if you can make it through this entire post there will be a point as to my sharing these experiences with you.
Oh and this post has nothing to do with sick kids or the swine flu....or my coming this close to asking the doctor to test Sydney for it. I did make him think that he wanted to test her for it but he thinks she might have influenza b this time. or something. GAWD ! (and yes, the rest are sick too)
This first story is a short starter outer story and because I like this story. Consider it the buffalo wings, ranch dressing and celery sticks of my post.
My Grandpa had a severe heart attack many years ago. It was his first one. Luckily my Aunt was in town visiting and was there with my grandma. They loaded up Grandpa in the ambulance and took off. My grandma and Aunt followed close behind in the car. As they arrived at the hospital and got inside both my Aunt and Grandma saw my grandpa in the elevator with the doctors, nurses and my uncle Allen bent over the gurney holding my grandpa's hand.
My grandma and Aunt looked at each other and my grandma said, "he's going to be ok"
You see. my uncle Allen died of cancer at the tender age of 21.
Turned out, my grandpa was in good hands.
Such a heartwarming, sweet story.
This story is also true and the details are still so fresh and real that they will never be altered or forgotten. If you don't want to believe me, that's fine too...I'm not here to make a believer out of you.
This is my experience and I'm sharing it with you.
I was pretty religious until my last 2 years in High School. I went to church....read the Mormon scriptures (The Book of Mormon) and felt like I had a pretty strong faith system.
One night when I was 14 I was laying in bed starring up at my ceiling. I noticed a shadow coming in to the room. It was seeping in by my window. It reminded me of a shadow that crosses over a room when the sun goes down kind of. It was thicker black though...and there was no sun to cause this as it was 11 o'clock at night. (a little like the movie ghost. remember when the spirits come to take the bad guys away. (I couldn't even use the movie as an overactive imagination as the movie hadn't come out when this took place)
I sensed a terrible presence and became very scared.
I blinked my eyes trying to adjust them to change the shadows but there was no getting rid of them.
I decided to pray. I knelt down by my bed and rested my face on my hands.
As I began my mind left me and wandered off. Not unusual, I was tired, but my mind drifted off to pictures you'd see on the news and in horror films.
I closed my eyes really tight and started in to my prayer again. I wouldn't get even a sentence out and my mind was gone to death and destruction. I sat up and opened my eyes and decided the darkness with my face in the bed and hidden from my hands was causing me to be even more scared so I began praying with my eyes open my face toward the ceiling. Again, blood and guts. It was the strangest and scariest thing. I had never seen the images that I was envisioning. I hadn't seen dismembered bodies and charred body parts. It was terrible. It was like my mind had a radio dial and right when I would get it to the station I wanted it would switch to another one. (funny I use this analogy, more to come on the radio in a later blog)
I was terrified. I climbed in to bed and grabbed my scriptures. I began to read and the same things happened. I wouldn't even get to the end of the sentence and I was picturing scary faces and demons.
I lay there and continued to watch the blackness ooze in to my room covering my whole ceiling, which was better than it moving because at least it just looked like the ceiling was dark now.
I remembered being taught to command them away and whispered, "in the name of Jesus Christ, get thee hence" It wasn't all, throw holy water at the shadows and scream, "the power of Christ compels you" over and over. no nothing like that.
I said it again with as much will as I could muster without shouting (again, it was late and everyone else was sleeping), "in the name of Jesus Christ, get thee hence"
I was confused. I was taught that this was the most powerful thing you could say. You could stop bad guys and bullets with this command. Why wasn't it working now?
The terrible thoughts and pictures in my head continued. I couldn't close my eyes without seeing something awful.
This went on for over 2 hours. I was completely exhausted. I laid there and honestly felt as if I had just battled Satan and his army.
Tired and emotionally spent I said, "Grandma, please help me"
My Grandma had died only months before.
At that exact moment....not a second less I was fast asleep. I woke up feeling completely rested and unafraid of anything that had haunted me the night before.
I knew then that my grandmother was watching over me and would always be there for me. I talked to her and asked for her help more than any other spiritual guidance for years after.
Ok, now. the reason I tell this story is because. The other night after reading books, getting water, kissing and covering up Sydney. She says to me, "mom I'm afraid of the shadow people on my wall. They scare me."
Without a single scary thought I said, "Shadows are a lot like clouds. It's fun to look at them and make them anything we want. Like that one. That one looks like a duck to me. See that's not scary." Just then a car drove by and the lights created moving shadows over her walls. "See, it's like a whole bunch of ducks and they just flew across your room." I pointed to the shadows high on the wall facing us.
She replied in a very scared and sad voice, "no. Not like those shadows. The people shadows aren't like those shadows. They aren't on my walls like those shadows. they are blacker" she rubbed the wall next to her with her hand. "they are bigger. like people" she held her hand away from her wall slightly. "they scare me"
It all came back to me in one blink of an eye I felt those same feelings and I too was afraid of those shadows on her wall. I laid down next to her and told her it was ok and that she was safe. My next thoughts were....is she experiencing what I did ?
I know, I know. I've seen those kids who see ghosts. Who can see the future.
"I see dead people."
I don't disregard any one's "stories" because I have one of my own. I don't know that I believe all that I hear, just like I'm sure you won't all believe what I've just told you. But it freaked my freak when Sydney revealed this to me.
The other terrible thing is. My poor little girl is RIDDLED with nightmares. Night terrors. She seems to yell and scream for the first few hours of sleep and even in the early hours of morning.
Thinking it was just night terrors I've dealt with them as such. I try and comfort her. I make sure she's safe from harm and after she's settled I go back to bed.
What if. What if she's dealing with these "ghosts"/"spirits". and is really scared sometimes. not all of the time, but sometimes.
I feel terrible for her. I know how scary it can be.
I have ANOTHER scary story that I will share later. wooooo-oooo-ooo.
It happened later with my first girlfriend (yes I have witnesses) AND a bishop AND a haunted duplex.
We used to tell it to our friends when we would go camping. It always freaked everyone out.
ok..nighty night everyone !
freakin' freak. Now I have to go listen to the beach boys until these thoughts are out of my head.
Maybe I'll just go count the duck shadows on Syd's wall. ;)