Tuesdays Typifications

Spencer has to be reminded 500 gatrillion times a day lately how to ask for things.    He's SUPER good at demanding things.  ie.  "mom, get me a drink"  "mom get me a spoon"  "mom put the bottle down and come out of the closet"  (ok, I was just checking to see if you were awake :)
Each and every day it's the SAME DAMN THING...."Spencer, how do we ask for things in our house ?"  Usually at this point he blurts out, "drink please"  We've taught him to say please like it's the magic word.   Like demanding with the word please attached is the key to getting what you want.
"Please don't demand from me Spencer, you need to ask.  Mom, will you get me a drink.  May I have a spoon."
He always complies and we start all over again.
J gets fed up and will say, "Spencer, if you don't ask nice the first time....you aint gettin it"

Sunday he asked me for a drink.  "Mom, Get Me Milk !"
I completely ignored him.  He said it again...only with more attitude and 'a look'.
I ignored him again...come on mo fo...you're smarter than this.   If we haven't gone over this for the last 6 mother friggin' months I'd help ya out...but please....now you're just wastin' both of our time.
He then chooses to walk closer and yell it in my personal space....because Obviously I didn't hear him the first 2 times.
I responded with, "No Spencer.   We don't ask for things this way.   And you Certainly don't talk to me that way."
He huffed and let out a frustrated growl and then walked toward the hall.    Which leads to the bedroom.   Where J and the babies were trying to nap.   Which then put me in the position of tackling him and wrestling him to the floor, hog tying him and slapping some duct tape over his mouth.
buuuuuuuut, I decided to see where it went.
He circled back around and was pacing.    Finally he says, "MOM! you either Get Me a Drink....or I'm going to go wake up Ryan!"  (see he is smart, he knows Ryan is the light sleeper of the two)  he continues, "What's it gonna be mom.  What's your choice gonna be ?  Get a drink or me go wake Ryan up ?"
SURELY you don't think I taught him that line.    Oh but Mother of Pearl I did.   friggity frack fargumsnogit.  I HATE IT when they say what I say and with the attitude and 'the look' and 'the eyes'  because FIRST of all....you are too small to be using such big words and screw you I don't look or sound Anything Like That When I Talk To You !    Makin  me sound all crazy and shit.

20 minutes later Spencer was able to free himself from the rope and duct tape....and asked for the drink using the words, mom, will and please.
ugh !

A very dear friend of mine has a nephew who went the drug route in life.    During one of the family counseling sessions they learned that.....kids who are bigger risk takers...dare devils, are more likely to become drug addicts.   Or was it, try drugs ?   Either way.....I feel blessed that I finally land on the right side of the fence as far as those statistics go.

and to answer your question.  cuz I know you are wondering now.   yes.   J is a drug addict.


WHILE I was video taping the kids on the stairs I was able to capture Nathan stripping off his unders.   Something I deal with EVERY STINKING DAY.   Only to my surprise something magical and almost hopeful happened.

Movie Monday

The Switch.  Starring Jennifer Aniston and Jason Bateman.
I went in to the movie with lower expectations because Jennifer was in it.    I'm not a huge fan of her movies...but I certainly love her.
  
It's about a girl (Jennifer) who get pregnant via artificial insem because she's getting older and wants a child.  Only the sperm she gets isn't from the donor she was expecting.   Thus the title.
It's a cute movie and the little boy (her son) in it is DAR-LING !  DARLING !   I would watch it again just for him.  So cute. 
Ok, back to my point.   There is a part in the movie where the bio dad (he's the only one that knows at this point) is putting the little boy to bed.   The boy collects frames and doesn't change the pictures to his own, leaving the model families in them.   He starts telling his friend/dad about the people in the frames.   One is his dad.  Grandpa on his dad's side.  An uncle from his DAD'S side.   A picture of him and his DAD !!!
You get where I'm going with this.
There is this whole sad and empty boy without a dad part in the movie.   Which in the movie is PERFECT because LOOK.  you actually HAVE a dad.  in the flesh.  right here.  the only guy you like.   WONDERFUL. queue happy feel good music....aaaaand bring up the credits.

It left me feeling terrible inside.   I haven't stopped thinking about it.  
My kids are going to be just like those donor kids on Oprah.   Always empty.  Always searching the crowd and picture frames for their dad.   For the other link.    They'll never feel whole or complete.  

Kids who have loser dads who aren't in their lives will know who their dads are and can be grateful that they aren't in their lives.
My kids will never know.  

It worries me when I think about it.    About the right things to teach them...the right way to present it to them so that they can grow up confident with who they are and where they came from.  That they'd be ok with it.  It's something that I've thought about since before conceiving them.    Convincing myself that they would be ok.   That love was all they needed.    That sociaties ideas about "the perfect family" would roll right off their backs.    My kids are lucky.   They have 2 parents that love them and wanted them and will probably still be paying for their creation too :)
I figured that my kids would make believe.....create through their imaginations their own little fairytale dad and how one day they would find him and he'd be rich and famous and love them with all of his heart.  
Hell....I had a family and STILL had these fairytales about how I was adopted and another family was out there ready to take me away and love me unconditionally.    I'm still waiting. :)  

The sad little depressed boy in the movie who didn't want to put his own pictures in frames has me all fucked up.

The movie was good though.   For a Jennifer Aniston movie I guess.   I recommend watching it. 

Sydney has been screaming bloody murder and yelling "no, no, no, no" and "don't, it hurts" and calling out for us "mama, mama" since about 9:30 pm.  It's now midnight.  It's been quiet for at least 10 minutes, finally....I think I'll post this....as it's now midnight and Monday.  
Yes, do the math....she's been terroring for 2 1/2 hours now.    GAWD I wish these would end.  
I'm pretty sure....that if she had a dad.....we wouldn't be dealing with these.
It's probably because she's missing a part of herself.   (sigh)   just so you know, I could probably talk myself in to that shit.
Not tonight though.   I'm tired.

I like to think that he is SO confident in his masculinity that sporting heels is no big deal.

That'll do'er

The air conditioner is working.  Fixed, no.  but working, yes.
There seems to be a leak and it can't be detected and apparently there are things to do to test for said leak that requires dye, time and UV glasses.

Syd had her surgery today.      I didn't tell her last night that she was going to be having it because she has stressed about the surgery since finding out about it.    We missed the class they hold for scared kids at the hospital but they do such a good job of explaining it before hand that it was ok.
I have to say that I could TOTALLY go Munchhausen by proxy.   It was so nice to be 1 on 1 with Syd.   It was also nice to be in a temperature controlled room with a plethora of fresh bagels and juices to eat during my stay.   All of the nurses and doctors coming up one at a time to explain and comfort us.     And childrens hospitals rock...especially new ones.   New toys that have all of their parts.    New books.  PLUS.   It wasn't busy....there wasn't anybody else playing with all of the new toys and books. 
I suppose it would be nice for me...but constantly being poked and cut open might not be fun for my kids.   Maybe I could just go and hang out there sometimes after J gets off work.  :)  

Up until the point to go back she had held it together.   She was nervous but was playing and checking stuff out.    One of the nurses came up and said, "Hi are you Sydney"  again...we were the only one's there....Syd said evasively, "nope." and kept playing.    Like that was going to get her out of surgery.
Syd cried when we had to say our goodbyes at the red line.   She was so scared.
She clutched my side and the tears started welling up in her eyes.    We explained to her how I couldn't go back because I didn't have scrubs on.  I hugged her and told her she'd do great.    She let out a quiet cry as she headed off with the anesthesiologist and nurse and so did my heart.     I knew she was fine and after the cotton candy gas I guess she was GREAT.
Thanks to all of the good people who suggested the anti nausea medicine.    They gave her plenty and it seemed to help.    It also kept her from waking up :)    3 different times she opened her eyes, looked at me  and said, "mama....I didn't know you were here!....I feel funny....I'm dizzy."  ha ha ha
As they wheeled her down to the car....I said to the nurse, "if she asks where I came from again when we get home, I'm going to get that anesthesiologists address to send him a Christmas card."   She didn't....and also ate a ton, which they said she probably wouldn't because her stomach had been put to sleep and she received so much fluid while she was there.
She ate though.   4 celery stocks with peanut butter, 2 pieces of cheese cut up into sticks and crackers.    Once we realized she was tolerating food we fed her chicken noodle soup ala dora style... an apple, 4 gummy worms and 3 more crackers.    2 hours later she ate a PB and J, 2 glasses of milk and some smarty's.
She drank most of her bright red raspberry slushy that she got at the hospital.   The babies spilled the rest on my nightstand and the floor.   of course.   I guess the anti nausea meds maybe worked too good.

As we sat and sifted sand in the sand box this afternoon Syd yelled while listening to the "Eye of the Tiger" full blast and on repeat, on Mommy J's mp3 player that she downloaded songs to for surgery day...."I WANT TO HAVE SURGERY MORE OFTEN."
After pulling her ear piece out I asked her why.  She responded with, "because you get to just relax"
So much for her fear of "the gas"

Syd holding the hospital pager from express check in.  We were the only ones there...but she wanted to type on the computer so I let her.    She was disappointed that it never buzzed.

Playing a cars video game while we waited

Drug induced

Her IV and blinking thumb

2 down 1 to go

Houston we have a van I repeat...we. have. a. van.
We went with the 8 passenger Odyssey in Silver.    It had all of  the bells and whistles that we wanted PLUS we were at our wits end and this was the one priced right.   I would have bought a mini cooper had that been presented Saturday.  I'm glad it wasn't an option :)
We are waiting for new carseats to arrive.   We went with the Radian 65's (thanks Steph) so that we could fit 3 in back and remove the 3rd seat in the 2nd row to leave room for the kids to climb back there.
That's not happening now, but when it does....it's gonna be SWEEEEEEET !

The no water thing is so not very cool.    I mean...it really isn't something someone with 5 kids should ever have to deal with.   No power, no air, no lights even....but no water was crazy.
Do you know what milk looks like coming out of several sippy cups after 2 days of 90 degree heat in the house with no water to wash them out.     We borrowed a couple of buckets of hot water from our neighbor so that I could wash dishes and OMG ! it was so-ho-ho nasty.
Oh and having your hands in hot water, cleaning curdled milk out of sippy cups in a 90 degree house isn't super cool either.

The plug.  It wouldn't screw back on after the putty had dried.  Oh....and just so you know, it does dry as hard as steel.   I haven't tried it on the diapers yet, but J totally used it to fix the dog door :)
ANY WAYS.   Our neighbor works for a plumming supply store and made a special trip on Sunday to work to try and find the piece for us.  no go.  After THAT didn't work out.   J cut some bits off here shaved some bits of there and was able to get it back in.   
I can't tell you how beautiful the sound of running water coming through my pipes sounds.    Music people.
It almost sounded as good as the sound of the toilets flushing.    Speaking of.    We couldn't flush them, because we had no water right.  (remember, it's 90 degrees too)  J.  my farm girl, grew up with well water.....and when the well was out of commission...like say the power was off....you couldn't flush your toilets either...and the only way to get the poop down is to pour water down the toilet.
J would go out......fill a bucket of water up with our secondary water supply from the sprinklers and dump it down the ole comfort station.    How wonderful that was.  

Now....we just need the airconditioner fixed and we'll be set.   Well, except the lawn mower stopped working yesterday...who knows what needs to be done to fix that bad boy.

It's raining it's pouring the old man is snoring.

Ok....so....yesterday when our neighbor came over to see what he could do about our leak...he brought his youngest of 3 daughters with him.  All of whom have babysat our kids.   I do believe she is their very most favorite person in the whole wide world. 
J and Todd were working on the plug when J overheard a conversation between Cameron and Maddie.
Somehow the word "dad" came up between the 2 and that's when J tuned in to the dialog.
Maddie, "that's my dad"
Cameron, "I have a dad....his name is Mommy J"

I crack up each and every time we go over this with them.   
Spencer had a talk with J about this very thing not that long ago.
Spencer, "I have a mama and a daddy"
J, "no, you have two mommies"
Spencer, "NO ! I have a mama and a daddy"
J, "you have a mama and a mommy J"
Spencer, "YAAH-UHH ! mama-mama, daddy-mommy J.  SEE !"

I don't see her teaching them how to shave their beards but she can certainly teach them everything there is to know about sports.  How to change their oil, replace a tire, finish a basement, lay a sprinkling system, install a toilet and repair just about anything that breaks in a house including a stubborn water valve plug.  
She has perfected the spinning of donuts in snow.    She knows all about programming anything from a computer to a thermostat.    She can pull wire, hook up an entertainment system and change a circuit breaker fuse.   She can find anything you can find, cheaper....and can deal with my shit every day for 13 years.
(feeling all verklempt) she's amazing.  (sniff sniff) I just love her.  She's the best (sniff) dad (sniff) I could ever wish for for my kids.   I just wish she were here to hug.
I wish I were a cat and she were a cat lady and I could just curl up in her lap and go to sleep.   and she'd take me everywhere with her.   (sigh)

I don't remember what my point to all of this was.   I need to go call my wife and tell her how much I love her.

Sydney has become quite the little face painter.   I now present.....Nathan.....her Cheetah.
All 4 of her brothers, Mommy J and her fiance Nate have all fallen victim.  
Not too shabby really.

 

To add insult to injury with some lemon and salt rubbed in for good measure

We still do not have a van.    Not for lack of trying.
I suppose if we are desperate we could tuck a few kids in the back of J's truck and tell them to lay down and be real real quiet.  cover it with a tarp.  tie it down so that you can't see inside and maybe put a couple of couch cushions poking out so that it looks like we are moving furniture.   Oh, I don't know, it's not like I've given it much thought.

Our air conditioner went out.   AGAIN.   for the 3rd time in 2 years. 
Remember we replaced the damn thing 2 years ago.  ugh.
It's 81 degrees in our house right now.  Much better than the 86 degrees yesterday.

Last night by chance I happened upon wet floors in the basement.    After some inspection we found that we had a leak in our pressure valve.    Thanks to having friends in all the right places.....we were able to figure out at 10:00 last night that it is a $4.00 part and an easy fix.   Not such an easy part to find.   My wife has been gone since 8:00 this morning trying to find one that will fit.    I am now praying that we can replace the plug and not the whole valve....because THAT would be much more work than I want to watch J do :)   
Until it's fixed, our water is off.    No washing of faces and hands....no flushing toilets.   oh and It's still that time of the month.  yeah.

Cameron has a fever of 101.8.

J just got home.....they don't make that valve anymore.   There isn't a replacement plug.    We're (and by we're...I mean J) is going to use some epoxy putty to plug it up.  It just doesn't sound like something that will hold a 100 lbs of water pressure.  If it does....oh the USES I can come up with for that stuff.  
I'll finally seal the dog door that the babies have broken and can now escape through.    I can plug up the hose out back so that they big kids don't turn the water on getting everything and every baby wet.   4 times a day.  requiring a new set of clothes each and every time because if left in a diaper only they WILL take them off.   GASP I'm going to use it to keep the babies diapers on :)   I'll seal the toilet closed so that the babies don't empty the toilet water on to my floor.   I'm going to stick the chairs to the floor permanently so that they aren't able to move them to climb.
PRAY that it holds....all of the above. 

Once again I ask....why do bad things happen to the most delightful of people ?   yes, I was referring to me.
ok FINE.  J.

Had to share this. My hope is that it makes someone smile.

My big boys went to pre school today.    They graduated from the speech/pre school program at the local elementary school.   Well, Spencer still qualifies for speech but I haven't heard when he will go.

Their new pre school is just down the street.   Maybe a 4 minute walk.   Sydney rode her bike and I pushed the babies in the double stroller pulling both boys 2 and from.    They loved it.   Cameron informed me that, "Mrs. Angela is really nice.   I like her a lot."   
I was thrilled because Cameron was a little hesitant to go in by himself.

We were on our way home, Syd clear ahead of us and around the corner already.    I saw a huge fat cat run across the road to a house just ahead of us.    Cameron said it was a dog.    I didn't argue and figured we'd see it soon enough when we came up to the house.   Sure enough.   Big Fat Cat laying on the lawn basking in the sun already.    Spencer walked up to it and it ran around a landscaped area.   I explained that he needed to crouch down as to not scare it and call kitty kitty kitty....before I had even finished he walked up to it again scarring it around and in to the street....where a car just happened to be....didn't even slow down and we watched the cats head roll under the big front tires....fur flew...it's body rolled under the rest of the car.
It's hind legs continued running as it laid on its back with it's head cocked back towards the road.   
My babies started screaming.   It's as if  they knew what had happened.    I covered my ears....because that's what I do.    I looked down the road at the car wondering if he would stop....if he would come back ?   Who was going to help this cat ?  Is there help for the cat ?  He's still moving his legs?   He needs to be put out of his misery ?  Was it a female cat ?  Was she pregnant ?   Was it somebody's pet ?  Somebody who loved it so much that it was all fat and happy ?  Is it going to die ?   Why won't it stop moving ?  
I didn't want to walk over to it because I didn't know what to expect and I didn't want my kids to come with me.    I didn't know if it was a stray cat with diseases....if it's guts were out on the other side.....I felt helpless and just stood there with my hands over my ears.
Right then a man emerged from the garage of the house we were standing at.     I asked him if it was his cat ?   Is this your cat ?   he just looked at me.  he wouldn't answer.   Did he not see the cat in the street ?   Did he hear me ?  
"Was that your cat ?" I asked again.   He shook his head no and continued on to the mail box.   Not looking at the cat and I wondered if he was nodding his head at me standing there with my hands over my ears or if he was answering me.
I said to myself, "it's still alive"
He finally spoke and said, "you better get your kids out of here."
Then I just felt like a bad mother.   Here I am standing here not moving while a cat is dying in the street.   Probably the brain injury that it sustained is causing it's legs to run.
I started walking and repeated, "oh no.  oh no.  that poor cat"  
My mind jumped to Spencer's role in all of this.   I certainly didn't blame him but I did feel like he had an innocent part in it.   Will he realize it ?  Will he feel bad ?  Should I talk to him about it ?

The boys haven't mentioned the incident since. 
The babies however keep bringing it up.  
Ryan : "cat, car, head"
Nathan : "car ah bonk ah kitty"
Ryan : "bonk.  head."
Nathan : "bonk. kitty"

I did mention to the boys as we walked away....that's why you don't play in the street.  Cars are dangerous.  They can hit and hurt or kill you.
Right after saying this it was time for us to cross the street.  There was a car clear down the street.  Spencer screamed and ran across the street ahead of us, "car ! car ! a car is coming !"  
I suppose it was a good lesson.

I'm still sick.   I just don't handle things like this very well.  
When I was little my mom was driving late one night and hit a rabbit.   She went back to check on it and it was still moving.   She circled around and hit it again.   She bawled the whole time.   I was shocked and wondered why she ran over it the 2nd time ?  Didn't she see it....AGAIN ?  clearly she knew where it was ?
She told me that she had to put it out of it's misery.    That it was hurting.
The strength and compassion she showed was painted on my brain that night.
I think of it almost every time I see a dead animal on the road or an animal who just escaped a near death experience.  And I remind the heavens that I don't have the strength that my mother had that night....and beg to not be put in that situation.   Luckily....I have not.
  
Today though, if I had a car.....I would have hit that kitty again.  and I would have cried the whole time doing it.

Speaking of a car.   I'm headed out to look at a couple.   Right now I'm carless :)
We are looking at 8 passenger Sienna's and Odysseys.   Any advice ?

Holes, holes and more holes !

Baverly is gone.   There will always be a huge hole in my heart for her.   No longer will I be mistaken for a daycare provider transportation, prison transportation or a polygamist.    I will also have to remember where I parked because walking out into a full parking lot and seeing Baverly stand out amongst all of the other smaller and not so stark white cars made it super easy to spot her.   
Syd's friends won't think we have a cool car anymore.    No more small bus jokes.   oh baverly (sniff, sniff) you were a good van and I love ya.
She has been picked up by a man with 6 kids and 1 on it's way in a couple of weeks.   (sigh)
Farewell my ginormous friend.   You will always be my big ass van-erly.

Speaking of holes.   Did you know that girls ovaries and boys testicles are both in their chests while still in the womb.
The holes allow the testicles to fall through to the scrotum and then once descended the hole closes up.   Only I believe the girls holes are for ligaments to form that support the uterus.  ANY HEW ! Syd's didn't close up.  It's called an Inguinal hernia.    It's much more common for boys to have these, but 2 in 100 girls will get them is what the surgeon said.
She was sick last week and had been crying extremely hard and I noticed a lump in her groin area....kind of on her pubic bone after her bath.   It concerned me enough that I called and scheduled an appointment for her immediately.    When we got there the lump was gone.  Now didn't I feel like an a-"hole". (pun intended)   Before I got too far with the apology's and the, "it really was there, a lump, right in this area" he unofficially diagnosed her with a hernia.
The bump that I saw, that she's seen before and hasn't mentioned was apparently her intestines coming out.   Wild right ?!
The intestines can get stuck on the outside of the hole and then can lose circulation and die which can lead to this whole emergency situation.    Thus the need to have it taken care of.
We were referred to a surgeon at the new Primary Children's surgical center hospital (right down the street from us conveniently enough :) and she's scheduled to have the hole closed up next Tuesday.  We'll be there about 1 1/2 hrs and only 15 minutes will actually be in surgery.    She'll be up and fine after and can go to school, if school was back in, the next day.    They scheduled us in for Tuesday so that she didn't have to miss school....which starts back next Thursday.   How nice right ?  There will be a tiny incision down on her pubic bone that will one day be covered up by hair. 
WHEW !

Ok, on to the comical stuff and more holes.
We had talked about and decided that Syd could get her ears pierced when she turns 8.   For no other reason than both J and I had to wait until we were 8 and because I felt like by 8 she could then decide if she wanted to put herself through it as well as the responsibility of taking care of them.
Syd being observant...you know, because she can see....has wondered why other friends and even babies have their ears pierced.   We always explained that in our house these are the rules.
Soon, she began voicing her fear about needles and getting holes stuck in her ears.    She did NOT want to get her ears pierced.  Even when she was 8.  She was NEVER getting her ears pierced. and, "mom WHY didn't you just pierce my ears when I was a baby and didn't know you were doing it...then my ears would be pierced and I wouldn't have to feel the needle !?"
Almost a year ago I took this opportunity of course to bend the rules a little and offered to take her to get her ears pierced if she wanted to while we were at the mall.   She again refused. ;-)

Fast forward >>> to last night.  Syd walked up to J and said with a pondering look on her face, "Mom, while I'm asleep during my surgery, can they just pierce my ears ?"   I love it.
I personally think she's brilliant for putting the 2 together.   I love how her little mind works sometimes.

She has been really worried about the whole procedure.   She doesn't want to go to sleep, but also doesn't want to feel the pain during surgery.   She just wants to cancel the whole thing.
J was comforting her and said, "you know, sometimes when you have surgery you get a little treat."
Syd jumped up and excitedly announced, "I want an electric scooter !"
J replied with, "ummm, I said a little treat."
Syd said, "fine, you have to listen to me"
J asked, "what do you mean ?"
Syd clarified, "I'm the boss.  You have to do what I say."

Fine by me.  We already do everything you say now any ways.
I was thinking an ice-cream cone or slurpee...but hey, your rules :)

Oh that girl.   Certainly a pain in my ass.
hole.   :)  hee hee....I had to.

Wild about Yams

THANK YOU for all of your nice comments on my last post.    Shit, I might just do a few re posts for self esteem boosts. :)
Really though, all of the credit goes to my friend Liz.

Ok.   GUESS WHAT ?!  This week was "the week"  The week from hell.  Week 3.   The one when I hate my family and my life and I want to kill my kids.   only.  it wasn't like that at all.    Aunt Flo dropped her bags off in my bathroom this morning.   She went to get the rest of her luggage but by tomorrow she'll be 100% moved in.
I have thrown a total of maybe 2 tantrums this last week.   and they were normal, I'm super stressed out and these kids are driving me CRAZY, tantrums.   Tantrums that I could have weeks 1 and 2 without a blink of an eye.   AND, we were at a family reunion this weekend.   I repeat...Family.  With my family.   and my kids were testy and hurt and sick and cried a lot.  (sigh)

I apply the wild yam cream 2 times a day to either my inner thigh, stomach, boobs and soft under part of my upper  arms.    You are suppose to alternate where you apply it for it to work (weird).
I am going to now go and pray to God that this keeps working.   That like everything else, my body doesn't adjust to it.
 How nice this last week was.

Bear Lake

A little bit of paradise just up from where we camped.

Look at what I got !!!!!

I suppose I could have put them in a slide show for you because sitting and looking is much easier than scrolling down.  I'm sorry.  I didn't know that I was going to show you ALL of them.  ha ha

Here they are.  not all of them, but the ones that I like the best.  which is most of them.

Thanks again Liz.   If anyone lives in AZ.  you would be CRAZY not to use her.   She's amazing. clearly :)

Will powerless Wednesday

What seems to have me by the balls lately.   It's just so easy and oh so delicious. and the possible ingredients are Endless I tell you ENDLESS !
Chocolate chip cookie sundae's.
I have frozen dough from Costco.   I started buying it so that I could pop in a few cookies when Syd would get home from school so that she would have a little treat to sit down and eat while she did homework and talked to me about her day.
Now I have them because they are DELICIOUS and convenient.
Problem is...they are much too convenient.    I even put them in the freezer downstairs so as to not tempt myself.  Oh No....I wasn't born yesterday...I know they are there and I also know that if I run down to put a load in the washer I can just bring the cookie sheet with me, place a few dough balls on it and wa-la....saved an extra couple of trips downstairs AND I got some laundry done.

You can bake the cookies in a deep dish little pan....but I just bake them like normal.  After they are cooked while still hot and gooey I throw 1 or 2 in a soup bowl....any dish will do.   top with a scoop(s) of ice-cream (your choice, again with the endless possibilities) drizzle some caramel and or hot fudge over it and top with whip cream.
YES, I HAVE ALL OF THESE ITEMS IN MY FRIDGE.   They were left over from birthday desserts and I've been slowly chiseling away at them.   When will the bottom ever cuh-uh-um ?!

Any ways.  I feel like if I say it out loud then I don't have a problem.   shut up.  I don't.

As I was typing this I was listening to my older three having a conversation behind me. 

Sydney : buddies, don't run into me with your scooters.  You aren't trained professionals like me.   You don't know how to stop and turn really fast like this..(demonstrates a turn, nearly missing Cam)...Go, go and practice so that you can do this...(demonstrates again, only this time she runs into the chair a little) and soon you'll be good like me.
both boys watching her very unimpressed by her cool moves.

Ok.  So it wasn't a conversation between the 3 kids per se, more like a sassy monologue.

I chimed in though.  right at the end when I realized they had brought the scooters in from the garage as I sat drooling over my chocolate chip cookie sundae post.

Me : hey guys, take them outside.   No scooters in the house.


They all 3 jumped on their scooters and took off down the hall.  not towards the garage or even a close exit.  in fact...further from an exit.
(sigh) oh lordy.  Now I have to get my angry eyes out and ready to put on because this won't end with any kind of cooperation.
I could really go for a sundae right now.

A pressing situation !

Labels :  Quirks, ticks, pet peeves.


Remember the post about how Ryan has to be touching us to fall to sleep any more.    It's worse now.   He actually climbs right inside of my abdominal wall and falls asleep next to my pancreas and kidneys.    I SWEAR if he could fit in my uterus he would.  (queue Patsy) I'm back where I belong.
Ok, so I exaggerated slightly.  but seriously he would.   Instead, he will now grab my fingers, pull them down and place his foot in my hand.   He then tries to grab my fingers and squeeze them with his toes OR my favorite thing, he tries to run my fingers through his toes.  OH GAWD !

Quick, a side story.  I have a pet peeve.   I've had it forever....I don't know WHY it's a pet peeve.....probably because I'm 'that' girl and horribly high maintenance and controlling.
First girlfriend.   She had this thing, quirky habit, if you will.   She loved to run her fingers through fabric.  Especially drapes.   She also loved to do the same thing with her toes in sheets.  
I would lay there at night, TRYING to go to sleep, and this rubbing would be taking place and the sheets would be stretched and pulled tight and then loose against my feet repeat repeat repeat....and I would sit there on NAILS trying not to scream STOP IT !
Fast forward.  My wife.  The one I've chosen to live the rest of my life with.   Rubs her damn toes through the sheets to fall asleep.
confession : many a nights I've said angrily, "STOP IT !"

And now my son.   My own flesh and blood does the same friggin thing...only with my fingers.   I'm a willing participant in this whole nails on a chalk board nightly event.

Now, ladies and gentleman.  (I'm sure there's at least one guy)  Our nightly freak show has only just begun.
Lately Ryan's preference, you know once he's tired of the toes thing, is to grab my 2 fingers and press them in to each of  his eye sockets.   Sometimes he presses quite hard and it not only freaks me out....but is super gross.   I've tried to move the placement to the inner corner of his eye...and he will pick my fingers up, move them back to the center of his eye and again press down.

Thing is.  When I was little, I remember doing weird stuff like this too.    I remember being 3 or 4 and pushing the corners of books in to my belly button.   It started out with just piling the books 3,4 then 8 at a time on to my stomach.   When I didn't get the kind of pressure I wanted I would press down on them and soon enough I started pushing the corner in until it hit my spine :)   I got this bizarre pleasure out of it.  
Because of this, I imagine that Ryan is getting the same feelings from the pressure on his eyeballs.  So I continue playing along.

He's not my first kid to do weird things.   Spencer has always had a binky in the mouth and one in the hand.   Never just one binky...2 binky mama, 2 !  He would pinch the 2nd binky between his pointer and index finger and then cup his hand around the nipple and then flip it with his thumb.  

Syd played with hair.  She played with mine when she was a baby and then when she grew her own, she played with it.   She would pull her fingers through the same piece every night until it was soft and then twirl it around her index finger until it flipped out of her fingers and then she'd start again until she fell asleep.   It was the only way she was able to fall asleep at night.    Oddly, when she gave up her binky she quit playing with her hair.   She told me that they went together and that one didn't feel right without the other.

Cam has tags....he's always worried tags on blankets and clothes...so we bought him a taggie blanket and he has to have it to go to sleep.

Nathan, thus far, hasn't shown any weird little behaviors.  He does snuggle with his baby when he goes to sleep but he doesn't HAVE to have it.    I think it's sweet so we put it in there. 
One day when he brings a date home I plan on pulling out lots of pictures to show.  ooh that's mean huh ?

So there you have it.   Little strange freak show things that help my kids go to sleep.   And it's all about them going to sleep.  So I'll stick my finger in his eye and rub my fingers through his toes damn it.  :) ha ha

funny this started about Ry-guy and now will end with pictures of all of the children BUT him.    I'll try and capture the eye socket thing and will post a picture later.

These are older pictures that I took to document these wonderful oddities.  I always want to remember.

Classy reunions and cherry blast icee throw up.

I had the PLEASURE of going with my wife to her, shmurdeshmur class reunion.   I won't even go to my own class reunion, let alone anyone else's.  There was a bet and bribery and she won.  BLASTED WOMAN
Their mascot was an Idaho spud.  as in potato spud.   
They are from a small farming town in Idaho.
You see where my trepidatious (is that even a word) attitude to participate might have come from, right ?

Not a lot of people showed up.   The executive committee had been changed 1/2 way through the planning stages and the whole event was moved from Idaho Falls to Salt Lake City at the last minute.    Still....I don't know if the turn out would have been better otherwise.

J received the awards for having the youngest children and being the most famous.


I suppose it helped to have lower expectations about the whole event, it's turn out and the people attending because I was impressed at how nice it turned out and how accepting and kind everyone was.   AND there was only one guy with a mullet.  

At our table we sat with the Dean of a college, a gay flight attendant, a Michael Moore look alike. (although thinner and much better looking) who tests pharmaceutical drugs in NJ, and a guy who works in the oil industry and seemed a little high the whole night. :)
The guy with the mullet has been riding motocross for 35 years and his wife wrote a really awful children's book about it. 
There was a woman who had just survived colon cancer.  Another has 8 kids and lost 65 lbs after the sudden death of her husband last year.  One had 8 kids and still lived in the same small town and another was a body builder who tried to befriend our blonde bombshell friend a while ago on facebook for no other reason than the blonde and bombshell parts.  
Any ways.   All in all the conversations were enlightening and friendly. 


Syd had a terrible headache Friday morning and started a fever shortly after.   A neighbor confirmed that her kids had the same symptoms days prior and that it seemed to be a 24 hr thing. 
note : kids with night terrors experience a WHOLE new level of terror that seems to last all night sometimes when sick. 
When Syd doesn't feel well she performs a drama filled sick role and plays the part to a T.   Including randomly screaming out in agony, crying for long periods of time, reminding me that she's sick over and over for sometimes hours and will hobble around the house with droopy eyes, wearing the face of death.

Saturday came and we went to the reunion at the park.   Guess who had kids there ?  yip.  just us.  Wait, towards the end a lady brought her grand baby :) 
Syd seemed to be on the mend and all was well and the 24hr prediction seemed to be holding true.
Last night though....terror after terror.   This morning....complaining of a bad belly and still hot.   We fed her some toast and Tylenol and just after asking for more she started whimpering that she was going to throw up.    I sprinted over and threw open my bathroom door, followed her to the toilet and pulled back her hair.
From the looks of it, she lost the toast her tylenol and the icee from yesterday afternoon.  
Poor thing.

And now a prayer.  Once again lord, please bless that this disease striken child feels better soon and that the virus that seems to be ravishing her body will not plague the rest of the household.  
Amen.

It's as if my prayer was answered immediately.   After proof reading this post, Syd is now in great spirits and playing the piano behind me.   
Thank you !

 

A mother's report card

How are you doing on your test ? 
My children test me all of the time.    My patience are tested nearly 12 hrs a day by at least one of them.
This is a pretty important test and I'm hoping that I don't fail this one.

It's sometimes easier for me to get through some of the harder times when I mentally picture myself taking a test and especially remembering what's at stake.

I know that getting through "stages" and certain behaviors is a bigger struggle when you think you are alone....when you think that something is wrong with your child or you as a parent (which I think we all question sometimes)   That is why I blog so honestly about the hard times.   Why I have referred to my children as the spawns of Satan on occassion. (which by the way...thanks to DNA testing and Southpark we were able to in fact confirm that Satan is the father :)  
I want to put it in perspective for others and hopefully help someone else on the brink of a nervous breakdown, to take a deep breath and remember reading someplace that there was another child who did this SAME thing.  (or probably worse:)
So that when they are being tested.....they can pass with flying colors.

I feel like there is a moment, albeit a brief one most of the time....when my child(ren) is throwing a huge tantrum, hitting someone, screaming something at me and I am able to clear my head for that short moment to analyze the situation.   Come down from my own growing tantrum and need to control the situation to actually see and understand what is happening.   
"aah, so you are mad because you didn't get your way, but also because you are hungry, you woke up early, you are starting to get sick, and screaming I hate you, you are stupid to me, feels like the only way to get it out"  and sometimes....they will have slept well, eaten had a GREAT day and don't have a living virus with in 10 ft of their immune system...but I can usually pinpoint why they feel so bad and sometimes, it's just because they feel bad.   Because hell, don't we all have times when we just feel bad.   Only we are grown with full access to our reasoning and language skills.  and even then we are "acting more like children, than children" (yes, queue Barbara Streisand)

Once you've caught that glimpse is when the multiple choice comes in.
Will it be ? :

A) Grab child up by the arm, drag child kicking and screaming to room, toss to the floor, yell something super productive like..."and STAY THERE" slam door and walk away huffing like you just ran around the block.  Heart racing, sweating, thinking to yourself that "ooh damn she's lucky because if she lived someplace else...they'd have beat the SHIT out of her for that"

B) Scream really loud, because you want the child to be able to hear you "STOP SCREAMING, YOU DRIVE ME CRAZY, WHY DO YOU ALWAYS HAVE TO ACT LIKE THIS" child then screams louder...as to scream over you....situation continues until you realize choosing answer A) would have at least given you a closed door to muffle the noise.

C) Calmly tell child, "I heard you Cam child, go to your room"  which then results in a multiple answer D follwed by A) and then you think back to the book that told you to be calm and fuck that book.

D) Wait a minute if you both need to..sit down on the floor next to the screaming mess of a child....maybe take the child in to a different room (I choose the boys room...it has a glider and is much easier on my body) give the child a hug if they will let you and slowly help him to calm down.    Try understanding....."I know that it made you mad that you couldn't ride the scooter....it's hard to take turns.   I'm sorry it made you so mad" 
Once the child is back to her happy(ier) self (which may have taken you the same amount of time as A-C)take the time to *quickly* mention to use words that describe the way they feel instead of hurtful ones.
Forget it and go on with what you were doing.

If you chose all of the above.  Well that's the answers I choose too.  :) 
also answers E F and G (not listed) which include dark closets, alcohol and ryhthmic rocking.

People feel like by choosing D that they are giving in to the child, that they are hurting the childs ability to calm himself down.  Spoiling the child.  That the child was acting out and should be punished accordingly.  
Thing is....the answer to the test doesn't always make itself known right away, even after the child HAS calmed down using answers A B or C.   We always think that the way in which we are handling it is the right way...because it's working and because the books tell us that it works.
The real answers come later on.   When the child is put in a position to handle a situation on their own.   When that same child reacts in a kind and understanding way...you know that you answered that question right at least ONCE before.  
When your child sounds JUST like you and even uses facial expressions while scolding one of the other children.....you know you probably picked A B or C a few times before. (we've all done it)

My REAL goal is to help my children build the tools to handle situations more calmly.  To have more empathy and kindness.  
They all have strong personalities (like me unfortunately) and I wasn't given those tools when I was young.   I was taught to control the situation with physical and verbal violence.    That guilt, silent treatments and holding on to anger is the way to handle almost every fight.

One of the things I'm MOST proud of....and one of the things I can see my children emulating the most is, letting shit go.
J and I have always resolved differences quickly.    We can disagree about something and then immediately ask a civil question unrelated to the fight and move on.    
My kids will do the same thing.    Even with me....Syd can be oh so very mad at me and only seconds later she'll ask me something as if nothing ever happened. 

I believe that the test is really all about "example"  It's not going to produce perfectly balanced and delightful people.  It might night even produce balanced and delightful children...we all have our own personality types and will make our own choices in life.   But again, it's about the tools that we have that can help us make better choices sometimes. 

I guess what I'm trying to say is....I wished I had chosen a donor with a super easy going personality instead of the brown hair brown eyes feature.   
Instead I chose one JUST like my own.    Oh god bless these children and the people that love them one day. :)  and please, please bless that by the time Sydney has grown in to a woman.....hormone balance therapy is not only easily available and paid for by most insurances but is also perfected and works.
Amen.

My pediatrician came out to me

Well, she came out to me for her sister.  
I haven't mentioned my new pediatrician I don't think.  
(vibrato) LOOOOOVE her.  Love her.   She is SO down to earth and she feels like an old friend and I feel 100 % confident in her opinions.  aaaand, she hasn't told me to hit my kids.  and yes, she's met them all.
She is awesome.    She job shares with several other doctors in this office so she only works 3 days a week.  (great job right?)  I have seen 2 of her partners twice and they are just as great.   Really liking the move.
ANY ways.   We got on to the subject of religion (go figure) and had a quick conversation about how we are both from Mormon families.   She then went on to tell me about a conversation between her husband and a couple of senior missionaries that stopped by during a family function.  
He talked about prop 8 and how they couldn't be a part of a religion that didn't support gay marriage...etc...etc.   That's when she told me about her gay sister and her wife and their 9 year old daughter (from the wife's previous straight relationship)
Our pediatrician has always been very nice and open with me.   She brings up and asks questions about the donor all of the time.   Again, very comfortable.   I guess I now know why.  
And yes...I will admit it....it made me like her even more !  :)

Nathan : aka tank soon to be our linebacker
Weight :  30 lbs  75%
Height :   36 in    95%
Head :     19.6 in 

Ryan :
Weight :  27 lbs   40%
Height :   35 in     75%
Head :     19.5

And as you'd have guessed it...they are practically perfect in every way.
I have a few concerns about their speech.   I have no way of gauging what is normal and what is considered behind.
I just recently read in Sydney's book that she was singing twinkle twinkle and pretty well at 18 months old.   Counting by 2.
The boys, not so much.   I didn't worry about them because according to the pediatrician I only needed to be able to understand what they were saying and they needed to be forming 2 word sentences which they were doing.
The babies aren't singing twinkle twinkle and lets be honest....we know it's because I'm not taking them to gymboree classes and spending all of my time on the floor with them playing and reading books.   They are saying between 50-100 words and forming 2-4 word sentences.  sometimes I understand them.  and sometimes others can.
I worry though.   I hope that we don't have the same kind of speech problems as the older boys.
I feel badly about it because I feel like it's Spencer and Cameron's intellect that is being judged by others when they can't understand them.   They are so smart inside....it's just being able to express it verbally that's hard.

Spencer starts his speech classes at the local elementary school in a couple of weeks.    Both boys start preschool at the neighbors (same one Syd went to) in a couple of weeks.   Sydney starts FIRST GRADE in a couple of weeks.  She will be in school from 8'ish in the morning ALLLLLL the way until 3:30 pm.   Full day.  a FULL day of school.     
I feel happy and then I miss her.  but mostly I just feel overjoyed and delirious :)
Sydney goes back to piano in a couple of weeks.  and the boys already have 1 gymnastics class under their belt.  They can do an arch up.  I'll have to get pictures at their next class to share.  
In a couple of weeks my life is going to change dramatically.

Life is move move moving along.   I feel like I'm going to blink and the leaves will be changing colors.
It goes too fast sometimes....but it's all so exciting.    I just have to keep typing it all down so that one day I can come back and remember how worried I was.   How hard it all seemed....and how great my life really is.

Pictures of Spencer and Cam.  My most darling and astute "stupee" (super as Spencer would say) heros !

My mom made these reversable capes for the big boys for their birthdays.   I love the little details she added, for instance Cam's cape has a C, for Supercam :)

Two to the 2nd power !

I love every single bone in your 2 year old bodies baby boys !

You make me laugh everyday !

Happy Birthday !

Make photo slide shows at www.OneTrueMedia.com

My favorite part is when they break in to Stevie Wonder at the same time.