Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Food for thought !

I have to say that I do believe there is a reason that spring follows winter and THEN is followed by summer.
and I'll tell you my thoughts about why.
Because spring gives you 2-3 months (or more depending how much global warming you believe in) to lose some of that holiday poundage before more of our bodies are revealed..  

So, I've got 3 weeks until summer....and 20 lbs to lose.   Should we start taking bets?   no.   I wouldn't either.   It's not looking so good for me.

ANY WAYS...all of this dieting and losing weight for summer has got me thinking.  
 As I scrubbed food off of the dishes I asked myself, what foods REALLY makes you fat.   and it hit me.
Here's my theory.   Our bodies are just like dishes.   If food sticks to dishes....it's SURELY sticking to your intestines where it spends enough time to allow for absorption and placement to your gut, butt and hips.  
Stay with me here.  example :   Oatmeal....slides right off with water.    as does malt o meal if it's washed off quickly.   Let that sit and you can count on some serious road damage in your tubes.
bread will absorb water and grow 2 twice it's size....but will also disintegrate and washes away no problem.
A lot of foods that you mix, for example casseroles, and then cook....stick like a mother to my plates.
Salad...falls off.   fruits...slide right off too.
  
Now.   another part of my process got me to thinking.   Hot water rinses stuff WAY better than cold.
For instance, cooked cheese.  not so good with cold water.....make it hot enough and that shit just slides right off.
Chocolate is great, it doesn't even have to be hot water....warm water works.

Think about what you eat....how it rinses off of dishes....and how to rinse it from your body.
If you are unable to get the water hot enough to drink.    Sit in a hot tub.....heat your body up to the right temperature and watch the pounds melt away.

It really is true.  I mean, why is it that when you drink hot coffee....you poop.   I don't drink coffee and I rarely poop.  proof right there.   and.   I know a lot of people who drink coffee just for the pooping effects.    I also know people who brew coffee to chase away the smell of poop.   but that's a whole other story.

So people.   If like me you need to shed some of those extra pounds.  Instead of all of this dieting and healthy eating and exercising.    Drink hot water.
OR.....drink hot plastic...because if your stomach is lined with plastic everything will just slide off.  so the plate theory tells me any ways.   I suppose you could always drink Pam cooking spray before eating as an alternative. hmm.

I'm off to drink my hot water.    Wish me luck.

oh and also....I want to look like this.   again.  not looking so good for me.  
a girl can dream right.




7 comments:

amy said...

you're hilarious... and on to something!! some of your theories make good sound sense ; )

Anonymous said...

I love to read your thoughts!
Melissa M.

Janet's page said...

Your theories are ALWAYS the best ones and seem to my way of thinking to be right on!!!

twomomsandajourney said...

Very interesting concept but I think you are on to something. 3 weeks - you could lose at leat 5 lbs by then. You have to start somewhere girl. :)

twomomsandajourney said...

Very interesting concept but I think you are on to something. 3 weeks - you could lose at leat 5 lbs by then. You have to start somewhere girl. :)

Holiday Programs for Kids in Singapore said...

Funny but seems to make alot of sense to me. Well, im trying to get the weight off me as well. maybe not up to those model dead hot body but a weight im comfortable with.

Oh my

DaniKel said...

I am loving your theory!! Sounds like a good plan... let me know how it is working for you!

Oh, and you said - you wanna look like this 'again'? Are you saying that's you in the pic?! Go hot Mama!!