Friday, August 30, 2013

Learning to say goodbye. again and again.

Our sweet Lucille died today.   We are still unsure as to what happened and shocked and sad.  They typically live 10, even 14 years.
She was not acting right and feeling well last night and this morning was much worse.
I took her to an exotic animals hospital and by the time I got her there and they took her back she had passed.

I know she's a lizard and she was Sydney's....but I did most of the work (as is the case with most young kids and pets) and grew quite fond of her.   I stood in the vets office (no charge), the vets assistant asked what I wanted to do with her, I told her that I wanted her back and when she left, as hard as I tried, a lump grew in my throat and tears filled my eyes.
I held it together but when I got in the car and laid her on my lap (in a towel) and called to tell Jan...I lost it.   I couldn't hide the quivering in my voice when I talked about what happened and had to wipe tears from my cheeks. :(   I was sad for Sydney,  I knew how hard this was going to be for her.   and I think that post trauma thing from putting Sadie down just recently came back too.

Sydney had a birthday party to go to after school today and as luck would have it went home with her which helped us keep it from her so that she would enjoy her time with friends.  and she did.
When she came home we had moved Lucilles cage out of her room and cleaned up some of her things...we walked her to her room and she looked around and said, "what. what is it ?  where's Lucille ?"  I told her that she died and she started to cry and came over for a hug.
We found a nice place to bury her in the backyard.   The boys weren't aware or invited to our little ceremony.  (mainly because we didn't want it disturbed later) and the 3 of us said one last goodbye to Lucy.

Afterwards, Syd got in the tub and I heard her crying hard...the ugly cry, and then I cried.  because she was crying.  and now I'm teary because I'm typing it.
All because of a LIZARD !   What the hell people.
Any ways...Syd is asleep.   She told me that she would miss her red lights at night...they helped her sleep.  and that she always loved it when she woke up at night to see her there.   That is right before she would come into my room and climb in bed of course. (another story another day maybe)

Goodbye sweet Lucille.   We are all going to miss you.
A year ago, when we first got Lucy


Stacie said...

:( So sorry about Lucille. Many hugs.

rachelleykins said...

Long time lurker. Just wanted to send my condolences. You have me crying just reading the blog.

RIP Lucille.


Stacey Bourgeois said...

Aw so sorry. All pets are difficult to lose. :(

Amanda said...

Who is sitting here crying like a fool over a blog post about a lizard that I have never met passing away? Yes, me :(

I am so sorry for sweet Sydney. I still remember the guest blog post that she did talking about Lucille and how much love and care was obviously invested in that creature. Sending thoughts to you and your family. Maybe you can return the red lights to her room for just a while?

Bloggity Bloo said...

:( so sad for you and Sydney. It's amazing how pet's become part of the family!

More Than Words said...

Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear about Lucy. I remember when you got her and how excited you all were. I hope Syd's little heart starts mending soon. :(

twomomsandajourney said...

I am so sorry. (((((hugs)))))

DaniKel said...

This brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry for your loss, and for Syd. And for you to have to hear her cry, the hard cry. Goodbye sweet Lucy. You will definitely be missed.

Stacy said...

No!! Do you know what happened?? Poor Syd, and you. So sorry, friend.

Ashleigh said...

Poor kid. Losing a pet is awful and it is even harder when it happens so suddenly. I'm sorry.

Mimi said...

Well thank you now I have to go and get a tissue.....and I don't even like lizards......hugs to syds.......

Amy said...

So sorry to hear about Lucille. As the main caregiver of Chester, Pete's leopard gecko, I totally understand your feelings. I would react the exact same way.

Karen Burch said...

We went through this with our first lizard, Ash and T was devastated by the loss. We all bawled like babies and I thought T was going to lose his mind.

I'm sorry you lost her.

Did the vet have any idea why she died? Was she egg bound? I know with females that can be a serious issue and some of them get eggs even without a male being around.

I wish we were close enough I could give Syd our Embyr. She is such a wonderful dragon, easy to love and take care of. Finding the time to love and handle and interact with all the members of our zoo is sometimes overwhelming. I would love to place her in a good home.

Tell Syd we are sending love and hugs, because we know exactly how hard it is to lose one of our beardie friends.